


you forgot to remember

by kyouyaed



Series: lay that pistol down, babe [7]
Category: The Magnificent Seven (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon-Typical Violence, Contains OCs, Fallout 4 AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-22
Updated: 2017-03-22
Packaged: 2018-10-09 06:44:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10406262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyouyaed/pseuds/kyouyaed
Summary: “Goody named me,” he repeated firmly, flinching when they dug their nails more forcefully into Billy's skin.Billy's memories are chaotic.





	

**Author's Note:**

> a note-slash-warning: this chapter is centered around Billy's past in the Institute, which means there are going to be a few ocs! one particular oc is reoccurring and pretty much a staple of this chapter. so while it is Billy-centric, it does have heavy oc content.  
> this is unedited. i will edit when i can. please, enjoy!

Billy wasn't sure how he got there. The walls, so white they were blinding, pressed in on him. Suffocated him. He didn't remember being back in this hell-hole. The last thing he remembered was falling asleep next to a still burning fire, Goody's hand on his thigh and Red Harvest's dark eyes glittering across from him in the deep orange of the firelight. And now he was here.

“We don't particularly need another cleaning synth,” someone said, and Billy snapped his eyes toward the speaker who was illuminated by a single spotlight. Cummings, he immediately recognized. The first person who'd ever spoken to Billy, back when he was R6-25, had been Arthur Cummings, head of Robotics. Cummings stood before Billy now with that same disappointed look on his face that had haunted Billy's early years. “A reject is only good for cleaning, and frankly, there are too many cleaning synths running around.”

Someone giggled and another spotlight lit up, shining down on the person. Yale, his mind supplied. The only human in the Institute to ever be kind to him. Yale, the one who... Billy's chest hurt at the sight of the orange sleeved scientist who grinned up at Billy like they knew some great secret.

“He looks...” That grin played at Yale's lips and the pain in Billy's chest amplified. He'd never thought about what had happened to Yale after he left. Billy had been too worried over himself to care, and by the time everything had calmed down... Billy had repressed the Institute memories so deeply it took a goddamn Courser to remind him of his designation.

“Weak?” Cummings supplied with a quirk of his brow. Yale gave him a cutting glare that had Cummings smirking.

“He looks _cute_ ,” Yale said. “My cute little killer.” Billy flinched when the spotlight over Cummings shut off with a click, and Yale's smile faded. “My cute little killer, the one who left me here to die after all I did for him.” Yale jumped at him and the grin came back in full force as their fingers clamped around Billy's cheeks. “Cute killer!” Yale cooed. They let Billy's cheeks go and stepped back, turning their head as if to talk to Cummings again. The spotlight over Yale faded as the scientist turned their head, and Billy blinked in the sudden darkness.

As suddenly as it faded, the spotlight snapped back on, illuminating a change of scenery. The walls were still the pristine, claustrophobia-inducing white, but if Billy squinted he could make out several Institute scientist and synths clustered around terminals. The focus of the spotlight was Yale, once again, with their arms wrapped around a small man's shoulders. The man being hugged looked like he was in pain and he sought out Billy's gaze with his own.

“What is _that_?” the man in question asked, and his voice and tone solidified who he was. Justin, the head of the Synth Retention Bureau, where all Coursers passed through for assignments and weapons. Yale grinned at Justin and grinned at Billy, that same all knowing look to the grin.

“That is your newest assistant, R6-25, Justy,” Yale said with far too much cheer for an Institute scientist. Justin fixed them with a glare.

“What's wrong with it?”

Yale huffed a laugh and flashed Billy a grin. “R6 here is a reject! I tried to get him sent to Infiltration, but Cora insisted he could help here!”

Justin set his gaze back on Billy, this time with a look of disdain on his face. “We're overloaded here and Cora sends a fuck up to help? What good's it going to do? Crash? We don't have time for fuck ups! The last one that we got went haywire and almost took out Myra and X3-36! We're still scrubbing scorch marks out from it's explosion!”

Yale huffed loudly and looped an arm around Billy's shoulders, pulling him and Justin close to their face. “Justy, Justy, Justy. R6-25 isn't a malfunctioning fuck up with the wires. Something went wrong with the information input. Cummings said he was supposed to be a Courser, but something with his Courser Chip went wacky so they had to take it out. Only I think that some of the Courser...ness, you know, that indescribable quality that makes a Courser a Courser, stuck in him. Isn't that right, R6?”

Billy tried not to flinch. It had been... _So long_ since anyone had called him a _fuck up_. It wasn't a nice term, not in any part of the world, but Institute scientists thought that synths didn't have _real_ emotions and as such used 'fuck up', 'reject', and 'malfunctioning synth' interchangeably.

“He's too fucked up to be a Courser,” Yale continued, their smile dimming as they set their focus solely on Billy. “But he's cruel like a Courser. Destroys, devastates. Leaves the stench of death in his wake. Don't you, R6?” That time, Billy did flinch, and Yale laughed a hollow, high laugh.

The spotlight on them faded, as did Yale's touch. A frown marred Billy's face and he peered around in the darkness. Maybe he would... Wake up? He wasn't entirely sure this was a _dream_. The spotlight returned again and Billy blinked in the vibrant white light and tensed immediately at the sight before him.

Red Harvest was decked out in complete Courser gear, from the flared black coat to the black gloves. The Red Harvest from his recent memory didn't have on the gloves, nor did he wear the standard issue boots he wore now.

“R6-25,” Red Harvest said, looking him over. It was impossible to tell what Red Harvest was thinking, plain faced as he was. He spoke in that monotone, the one that Billy had recognized almost instantly as a Courser's monotone the minute they met in that field.

“My name is _Billy_ ,” he corrected, unsure as to what prompted it. Goody's voice, perhaps? The memory of his closest companion so readily defending him, naming him so boldly in the face of what could have been a brutal Courser? Warmth spread through Billy at the memory, but Red Harvest narrowed his eyes.

“You are a fuck up like they said,” Red Harvest remarked, but it wasn't his voice. His lips moved, eyes stayed narrowed, but the voice that came out of his mouth was one Billy was deeply familiar with. “You hear me, _R6-25_? You're a fuck up and the Institute should have gotten rid of you when they had that chance.” Billy couldn't stop the flinch at the words being spewed in Goodnight Robicheaux's voice.

“Goody...?” Billy wondered, his voice no more than a whisper. A cruel smirk curled Red Harvest's lips and he shook his head.

When he spoke, it was still in Goody's voice, but Billy had never heard Goody speak in such a cruel manner. “No one is here but you and me, R6. You're not going to wake up from this. Goody isn't going to save you. Why would he?”

“Excellent question!” Yale's perky voice chimed, and they poked their head up over Red Harvest's shoulder to smile down at Billy. “Goody doesn't love you,” Yale informed him cheerfully. “I think he feels bad for you. Or maybe he's playing the long game and he's going to haul you off to the Brotherhood one of these days. No matter what it is, he's not here, and he can't save you. When has he ever saved you?”

That was an easy question, and Billy was surprised that Yale would ask it. Goody saved Billy too many times to count, but the one that came to mind was arguably the most powerful moment of Billy Rocks' entire life.

“He named me,” Billy said simply. His eyes widened a fraction when Yale screeched and launched themselves over Red Harvest's shoulder to tackle Billy. They fell out of the spotlight that dimmed quickly over Red Harvest and reappeared over them. Yale sat across Billy's chest, palms pressed hard against both of Billy's cheeks, nails digging into the skin just under his eyes.

“ _I_ saved you,” Yale hissed, voice low and eyes dark. “ _I_ got you out of this godforsaken hole! _I_ made sure they didn't _burn_ you with the rest of the garbage! _I_ told you how to find the Railroad! _I_ gave you _life_!”

Billy blinked up at Yale, artificial heart pounding so loud Billy wondered how Yale didn't hear it. “Goody named me,” he repeated firmly, flinching when Yale dug their nails more forcefully into Billy's skin. He winced when he felt them draw blood and Yale sneered down at him.

“You owe your entire _existence_ to _me_! You were a _fuck up_! You're _still_ a fuck up, R6-25!” The vitriol was much easier for Billy to handle when it wasn't spewed in Goody's voice, but hearing it from the person who had first showed him compassion hurt. “Without me, you would still be rotting in this Hell! What's a name on _freedom_ , R6?!”

Billy hissed when Yale dug their nails further into his cheeks and gave his face a shake. “My name is Billy,” he said firmly.

“Your name is R6-25!” Yale practically howled. “You are nothing but a lump of synthetic flesh!” One of their hands dragged down Billy's face and came to rest at the base of his throat. Billy's eyes widened when Yale clamped their fingers down around his throat, digging their nails into the delicate synthetic flesh there. “This isn't _blood_. You don't have a _heart_. You don't need a _name_. I freed you out of _pity_.” A cruel smirk curled over Yale's face and when they next spoke, it was Goody's voice again. “I saved you out of pity. I never wanted you around. No one in their right mind wants a fuck up Synth doing any kind of work.”

“Go...ody,” Billy gasped, bringing both his hands up to grasp Yale's wrist. Yale's eyes narrowed and they brought their other hand to continue choking Billy.

“He doesn't love you,” Yale spat, their voice still replaced with Goody's. “Who could ever love a synth? He'll kill you the first chance he gets. Him, the courser, Chisolm.” Yale let out a laugh that started as Goody's familiar laugh and faded back to Yale's bitter laughter. “ _I_ was... No, I _am_ the only person who will ever care about you, R6-25. Don't forget that.”

They gave a particularly forceful shove forward on Billy's neck and he gagged and struggled to breathe. Black tinged his eyes as Yale kept their full weight on Billy's neck, fingernails drawing blood as they pressed into his skin. The last thing Billy saw before his vision faded out was Yale staring down at him with an expression so sad Billy could almost believe what had just happened was fake.

He woke up with a start, coughs already spilling out of his mouth before he was fully conscious. His neck ached and coughing tore at the insides of his throat.

“Billy?” the most familiar and comforting voice came, soft and concerned. A warm hand came to rest on Billy's stomach and Goodnight Robicheaux guided him into a sitting position, rubbing Billy's back with his other hand. “Get him some damn water!” Goody barked to someone Billy couldn't see, hunched in on himself as he coughed. “Are you okay?” Goody's soothing voice was back, directed at Billy again.

“His system is fine,” Red Harvest's monotonous voice answered.

Billy continued to cough as he imagined the deadpan look Goody most likely directed Red Harvest's direction.

“I didn't ask you,” Goody snipped. “Billy. Can you talk?” Billy shook his head before another round of hoarse coughs took him over. He brought his hands up to cover his mouth and coughed, comforted only by Goody's hands holding him steady.

“Got water, Goodnight,” Faraday's breathless voice said, and Goody withdrew his hands for a few seconds before one came back to his stomach.

“Need you to sit up,” Goody said patiently, smoothing his hand from Billy's stomach up to his chest in an attempt at getting him to uncurl. He did, slowly, the coughs making it harder for him. Goody was patient, though, and helped him sit up as the coughs slowly eased, and Goody brought up a water canteen to his mouth. “Drink,” he ordered in the voice that reminded Billy sometimes of Goody's past as a Paladin. Billy did as ordered, and the relief on his throat was immediate.

“What happened?” Sam Chisolm's voice was clear and crisp in the still air as Billy's coughing stopped. “Goody? Billy?”

“Nightmare,” Billy coughed out, finally looking up to face his companions. All of them were gathered around the small fire in the dim light of dawn, though his eyes barely registered the darkness. _He was supposed to be a Courser_ , Yale's voice rang through Billy's head, and he unintentionally flinched.

“About what?” Sam pushed, and Billy glared.

“Sam,” Goody warned, and Billy's chest warmed. It was just a nightmare. Goody loved him, and wanted him around, and would never abandon him and it showed in that warning tone and the way he shifted closer to Billy ever so slightly. It was just a nightmare.

“Flashbacks,” Billy finally explained, reaching up to touch his throat. Now that the coughing was over with, Billy's throat didn't hurt in the slightest. It only felt slightly raw from the coughing, but there was no pain that should have come from being choked out so forcefully. He wasn't accustomed to nightmares, though, so Billy reasoned that his sensors went into overdrive and overwhelmed his system with phantom pains from his nightmare. “I am fine,” he stated, dropping his hand. He pushed himself up from the ground and dusted himself off before patting himself down to make sure he still had all his weapons. When he was done, Billy looked up to face the other five. Sam levelly met his gaze with narrowed eyes and a frown.

“Fine,” Sam said, not looking away from Billy. “Since we're all up, let's get a move on. Still have a ways to go to clean up.” Sam held Billy's gaze as Faraday and Vasquez groused and groaned about leaving so early. Billy inclined his head to Sam and Sam nodded, breaking eye contact to focus instead on Faraday whose whining was so loud that it was a wonder no feral ghouls had found them.

Billy shook his head and looked over his shoulder, smiling slightly at Goody who eyed him curiously for a few long seconds before he slung his arm around Billy's shoulder.

“My, my,” Goody teased. “Exchanging deep meaningful looks with Mr. Chisolm. Keep that up, and I might think you're infatuated with him.”

Billy snorted. “You are the only person who matters, Goody,” Billy told him seriously, and if Goody picked up on the deeper meaning to that statement, he didn't show it. He only squeezed Billy's shoulder and grinned.

“You an' me against the world, my Billy,” Goody murmured. “Always.”

Billy hoped that would always be true, but Yale's contemptuous words spewed in Goody's voice lingered in the back of his mind, left him with just a slight nagging feeling of doubt in his soul about Goody's intentions. After all, who could ever love a synth?

**Author's Note:**

> sorry this took so long! i had to write this chapter twice, and then i just sort of let it sit and i finally came back to this chapter cause i got such a kind comment on the last chapter (thank you so much Mari_Knickerbocker!! your comment made me so happy!) that it inspired me to update! so i have a few things to say about this chapter!
> 
> 1\. Justin in the 2nd flashback is definitely Justin Ayo from Fallout 4 canon. god i love and hate that man so much (whenever i play as my Institute characters and i go near him, i like to make mean comments at him :/)  
> 2\. umm did any of y'all notice what Billy's synth designation is... R6-25... 6-25 would be OCK on a phone keypad... so ah... his synth designation is ah... RO-CK ;)  
> 3\. i pictured Yale to kind of look like Colress from Pokemon B2/W2. my cool suave gender neutral Institute scientist  
> 4\. Billy is having a bad time I'm so sorry. BUT I'm really excited and pleased with how this chapter ends!! I haven't decided if Yale is dead or alive yet, but they will probably appear a few more times no matter what! And i'm hoping to get across some drama between Red and Billy, but i worry it's coming off more as between protective Goody and Red? but no matter what i decide to write/end up writing, i'm really excited cause Billy is one of my fave characters and getting to expand on him in this AU and learn more about his character in general and share about his character in this au makes me really happy!!
> 
> ok i think that's about all i have to say for this chapter without giving away lots of spoilers <3 anyway I am sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. i don't have anyone in my life to bounce ideas off of with this au, so it's just me and it takes me a while to sort out all my ideas alone. now!! please please let me know your thoughts and opinions (or even ideas!!!!) in either the comments or [on tumblr](http://conspiracieys.tumblr.com/ask)! thank you guys for all your support and kindness!


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